Breaking up from a relationship and being a roommate with your partner is from one hand a bad scenario but from the other one is all clear up. But breaking up from a marriage or anyhow having kids in the middle, dogs, loans is a whole different matter. Bigger and complicated.
The second scenario of break up things are much more different, much more difficult. Especially when the couple must to live under the same roof. Either for a short time of period or longer. Either way the whole thing is uncomfortable and painful no matter the reasons.
Children are the main reason that the couple still share the same house together even if their paths are separated already, because parents live together in order not to hurt their kids, and later will slowly slowly announce their divorce, or perhaps until they grow up at a certain age to understand the reasons.
Two persons that became strangers, trying to live under the same roof ''for the sake'' of their children and at the end they make things worse. What does matter the most is not was ''it's shown'' but what it ''is''. What matters the most is not to appear or to be shown in the eyes of others a family, but to be in reality a family.
When you feel like there is nothing to connect you with this person anymore but you still stick to something that is unhealthy for both of you, it affects the children as well in a bad way because they understand the ''compulsively'' and feel the change. When you are forced to do something, forced to live with this person, how successful can all this be?
Then there is the financial part in a case like this. When all of the sudden the common account/fund has to separated which is something very difficult and not feasible in many cases.
Many couples have to live with each other because of financial problems just because they have no other choice? Separate houses, separate bills, kids' sustenance.
Sometimes one has no job, therefore the income is less and the person who is unemployed is not fully independent is the main cause that he has to stay most of the times. Because he has not learn to live alone or years have passed without a permanent job or not one at all and is very difficult for him to find one.
Consequently when this person has no earning and can not stand by his own, is not independent, the next thing he can do are more compromises and can not leave so easy. Pushing his patience's' limits since the less autonomic you are the less choices you have.
These are the type of people that live under the same roof without being connected anymore with those same things that they used to be connected years ago when they first started to live together. A relationship or a marriage. They don't live together nor because they use to each other, or because of love. The live together because of neediness. Because they can not do otherwise and can not afford it.
Because of the children or because of the money, however little matters. Whatever the reason, the moment you are being forced to live with this person, that you don't have anything more to give and stay with this person, ate the same time you have lost yourself as well, you have lost the other person and of course whatever you both used to have between you two.
There is nothing that left to hold on, nothing to keep you going.
Love. Flower Girl. x
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